"No Wood, you know, splits any easier than a Pine."—Ramsey Benson.
"But Eliza," said the mistress, "your little boy was christened George Washington. Why do you call him Izaak Walton? Walton, you know, was the famous fisherman."
"Yes'm," answered Eliza, "but dat chile's repetashun fo' telling de troof made dat change imper'tive."
The mother of the girl baby, herself named Rachel, frankly told her husband that she was tired of the good old names borne by most of the eminent members of the family, and she would like to give the little girl a name entirely different. Then she wrote on a slip of paper "Eugénie," and asked her husband if he didn't think that was a pretty name.
The father studied the name for a moment and then said: "Vell, call her Yousheenie, but I don't see vat you gain by it."
There was a great swell in Japan,
Whose name on a Tuesday began;