"Have you had any experience as an office-boy?"
"I should say I had, mister; why, I'm a dummy director in three mining-companies now."
OFFICE-SEEKERS
A gentleman, not at all wealthy, who had at one time represented in Congress, through a couple of terms a district not far from the national capitol, moved to California where in a year or so he rose to be sufficiently prominent to become a congressional subject, and he was visited by the central committee of his district to be talked to.
"We want you," said the spokesman, "to accept the nomination for Congress."
"I can't do it, gentlemen," he responded promptly.
"You must," the spokesman demanded.
"But I can't," he insisted. "I'm too poor."
"Oh, that will be all right; we've got plenty of money for the campaign."