"Where hae you been the nicht, Andrew?" asked the minister.
"Weel, I dinna richtly ken," answered the prostrate one, "whether it was a wedding' or a funeral, but whichever it was it was a most extraordinary success."
See also Thrift.
SEASICKNESS
A Philadelphian, on his way to Europe, was experiencing seasickness for the first time. Calling his wife to his bedside, he said in a weak voice: "Jennie, my will is in the Commercial Trust Company's care. Everything is left to you, dear. My various stocks you will find in my safe-deposit box." Then he said fervently: "And, Jenny, bury me on the other side. I can't stand this trip again, alive or dead."—Joe King.
Motto for the dining saloon of an ocean steamship: "Man wants but little here below, nor wants that little long."
On the steamer the little bride was very much concerned about her husband, who was troubled with dyspepsia.