SPINSTERS
"Is there anyone present who wishes the prayers of the congregation for a relative or friend?" asks the minister.
"I do," says the angular lady arising from the rear pew. "I want the congregation to pray for my husband."
"Why, sister Abigail!" replies the minister. "You have no husband as yet."
"Yes, but I want you all to pitch in an' pray for one for me!" Some time ago the wife of an assisstant state officer gave a party to a lot of old maids of her town. She asked each one to bring a photograph of the man who had tried to woo and wed her. Each of the old maids brought a photograph and they were all pictures of the same man, the hostess's husband.
Maude Adams was one day discussing with her old negro "mammy" the approaching marriage of a friend.
"When is you gwine to git married, Miss Maudie?" asked the mammy, who took a deep interest in her talented young mistress.
"I don't know, mammy," answered the star. "I don't think I'll ever get married."
"Well," sighed mammy, in an attempt to be philosophical, "they do say ole maids is the happies' kind after they quits strugglin'."