"Call all hands to clear the wreck."
THE USEFUL YOUNG MAN.
A SECOND SERIES. BY WILLIAM COLLIER.
"There's one of us in every family."
To make ourselves useful's a duty we owe To mankind and ourselves in our sojourn below; To return good for evil, and always "to do Unto others as you'd have them do unto you:" So I bear all with patience, resolved, if I can, To act well my part as a Useful Young Man!
But, alas! entre nous, 'tis a difficult task, As seldom I'm left in life's sunshine to bask; For I'm hurried, and worried, imposed on by all, Who think I should run at their beck or their call: "So obliging," folks say, "is their favourite Sam, That he well earns the name of the Useful Young Man!"
Each morning at breakfast I'm doomed to peruse "The Herald," and "Post," for "the family news," While the toast, eggs, and coffee, which fall to my lot, Get a pretty considerable distance from hot: Yes, such are the Comforts—deny it who can?— That fall to the share of each Useful Young Man!
If Jane, or Maria, for work should agree, The dear creatures invariably send down for me To make myself useful, and read while they knit, Paint, draw, or do anything they may think fit. Thus, Sam—poor pill-garlic!—they safely trepan: Alack! what a life leads a Useful Young Man!
If the day's rather wet, and they can't gad about, They think nothing whatever, of sending me out:— "Now, Sam, my good fellow, just pop on your hat; Run to Howell's for this thing, and Holmes's for that; You'll make yourself pleasant we know, if you can,— What a comfort to have such a Useful Young Man!"