* * *
Or a Second Bill Sunday
A father, wishing to satisfy himself as to the future prospects of his son, decided to make the following test:—“Now,” he said, “I will put here, where he will see them the first thing when he comes in, a Bible, some money, and a bottle of whiskey. If he takes the Bible he will be a preacher, if he takes the money he will be a business man, and if he takes the whiskey he will be no good.” Having thus decided on the plan, he arranged the articles and concealed himself to await the son and watch results. Presently in came the boy, saw the money and put it in his pocket, took up the bottle of whiskey and drank it, put the Bible under his arm and walked out whistling. “My gracious!” exclaimed the father, “he will soon be a United States Senator.”
* * *
Doggonit
A farmer friend of mine was standing in the road with a gun tucked under his arm and an old dog at his side. He was directly in the path of a motor car. The chauffeur sounded his horn, but the dog did not move—until he was struck. After that he did not move.
The automobile stopped and one of the men got out and came forward. He had once paid a farmer $10 for killing a calf that belonged to another farmer. This time he was wary.
“Was that your dog?”
“Yes.”