My Evening Prayer
Now I lay me down to sleep,
Behold, around me bed-bugs creep.
* * *
Harrowed husband to barber: Please don’t use that sweet smelling soap on my face.
Barber: Why not, sir; it has a delicate lasting scent.
Harrowed husband: That’s just it; my wife won’t believe it.
* * *
I’VE HAD A LOT OF JOYS ON EARTH;
I DON’T WANT TO BE A HOG.