Some folks would rather

Blow their own horns than

Listen to Sousa’s Band.

* * *

Greatness does not depend on size. Napoleon if he were living today would never get a job as a cop.

* * *

And Very Nice, Too!

A feller was engaged to a girl who was a twin. When asked how he told them apart, he said: “Well, they’re both nice girls.”

* * *

Our friend Deegan insists an Irishman dies only when an angel is needed in heaven.