The boy sat quite still as if pondering over some question, and then, concluding that full information had not been given, called loudly to the conductor, then at the other end of the car: “And mother’s thirty-one!”
News for the Bishop
A newly-rich woman, who was anxious to make a favorable impression in her neighborhood, decided to show her collection of antiques to the Bishop when he called. The time came, and one by one she displayed the whole collection, giving him the history of each piece. Finally she pointed to the most prized article in the lot. “There,” she said, pointing impressively to an old yellow teapot. “That teapot was used in the Boston Tea-party.”
A Case of Mutual Application
Mr. Wood, a man very fond of playing jokes, met his friend, Mr. Stone, and at once inquired jocosely:
“Hello, Stone, how are Mrs. Stone and all the little pebbles?”
“Fine,” said Mr. Stone, “all well, thank you,” and then, with a twinkle in his eye: “How are Mrs. Wood and all the little splinters?”
She Didn’t Sleep Well
A woman who lives in an inland town, while going to a convention in a distant city spent one night of the journey on board a steamboat. It was the first time she had ever traveled by water. She reached her journey’s end extremely fatigued. To a friend who remarked it she replied:
“Yes, I’m tired to death. I don’t know as I care to travel by water again. I read the card in my stateroom about how to put the life-preserver on, and I thought I understood it; but I guess I didn’t. Somehow, I couldn’t go to sleep with the thing on.”