"A belted earldom's far beyond

My poor deserts: it must be Mond.

He's so distinguished, such a stunner

In every sort of way," says Brunner.

"As a thorough-going democrat

I always travel steerage;

I'd sooner eat my Sunday hat

Than take a nasty Peerage;

Such sops the snobbish crowd may soothe,

But not yours truly, Handel Booth."