From down-at-heel slippers, old coat, and churchwarden;

Condemned him to dress in swell togs void of ease,

To hurry and scurry, to crowd and to squeeze;

To horrible burdens and journeys of length,

Exceedingly trying to temper and strength;

To puff like a porpoise, to pant and perspire,

To doing—whatever he didn't desire!

Never was heard such a horrible curse!

But what may give rise

To some little surprise,