THE SPILL!
JACK AND JILL WENT UP THE HILL
TO FETCH A PAIL OF WATER,
JACK FELL DOWN AND BROKE HIS CROWN,
AND JILL CAME TUMBLING AFTER.
OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.
The Variety Stage, by Charles Douglas Stuart and A. J. Park (Fisher Unwin), is a history of the Music-halls from the earliest period to the present time. And a very interesting history it is, admirably told withal. One comes upon names familiar in boyhood, and is a little shocked to find that the Great Vance was really named Alfred Peck Stevens. The pages glow with pleasant peeps of London at midnight, as Pendennis saw it, and as, once at least, it was looked upon by Colonel Newcome. It is sad to find how many of the old favourites of the music-hall fall upon evil times, and even die in the workhouse. Sam Collins was more fortunate. He was sumptuously buried in Kensal Green, where a marble pedestal carries his portrait and his epitaph. This last is notable as containing what, as far as my Baronite knows, is the most audacious rhyme in the English language. As it was admitted to consecrated ground, it may perhaps be quoted here. "A loving husband," so it runs—
"A loving husband and a faithful friend,
Ever the first a helping hand to lend:
Farewell, good-natured, honest-hearted Sam,
Until we meet before the great I AM."
Pro Baron de B.-W.
Diplomatic Intelligence.—Mr. Chauncy Depew has arrived. On business, of course. De-pew-ted by American Government.