All alonger tin o' green an' a sniper lank an' lean
'Oo was swearin' an' a-strafin' an' a-snipin' in between,
Till the Sergeant told me off to stop 'is ticklin'.
So I trimmed meself with straw, an' a grass an' hay coffyure,
An' I clothed meself with faggots that a pal 'ad;
Then the Sergeant got a brush an' some green an' sticky slush,
An' 'e plastered me all over till I couldn't raise a blush,
And I looked jest like a vegetable salad.
Then I crept out in the night, an' I waited for the light,
But the sniper saw me fust an' scored an inner.