Under the heading, "Musical Instruments, etc.":—
"American mammoth bronze turkey cockerels, strong, healthy, grand stock birds; 20s. each."—Glasgow Herald.
You should hear these musical instruments throw off "Yankee-doodle."
Servant. "I can't get this 'ere tail light to burn, Sir."
Country Doctor. "Oh, never mind. We're only going home, and I've got the constable safe in bed with lumbago."