In. For. Dear me! I am sorry to hear it! But surely your Fleet is fairly strong?
Com. Gen. (laughing). What a joke! Oh, I dare say, ship for ship and gun for gun, we are more powerful than any other nation. But if hostilities broke out, our Fleet would be valueless. We should want every vessel to guard our island shores, and our commerce and colonies would have to shift for themselves.
In. For. (with concern). Dear me! This is very sad! But then you have an Army?
Com. Gen. (with another burst of laughter). What! Call our wretched force an Army! Why, to quote a writer, whose letters have been published in our leading journal, "Nobody could tell the Secretary of State for War how a force of forty thousand men, if it had to be supplemented for defensive purposes by Volunteers, could be supplied with ammunition for six weeks." Call our force an Army! Why, my dear Sir, the notion is absolutely ridiculous!
In. For. But does not such a state of things make you uneasy?
Com. Gen. Uneasy! Of course it does! Why, at a moment's notice, this grand old country might disappear for ever! Why we all feel that we are on the point of dissolution! We know that only a ninth-rate Power has to send a fleet to invade us, and we should have to submit—that we should be absolutely effaced, and be known in future as merely a geographical expression!
In. For. But surely this is lamentable—demoralising?
Com. Gen. I should rather think it was!—awfully demoralising!—(Sound of telephone bell.)—But will you pardon me? Some one wishes to speak to me from Head Quarters. I won't be a second.
In. For. Certainly. Pray see what it is.
Com. Gen. (listening, and speaking through telephone). What! Not really? Hurray!