In. For. Why, what is the news?
Com. Gen. (excitedly). Splendid! The Great Powers of Europe have simultaneously declared war against us! This will be grand!
In. For. (in a tone of deep commiseration). My poor fellow, this means ruin!
Com. Gen. Ruin! Rot! (Through telephone.) All right, will start to-night, and should be in Paris by Thursday, and at St. Petersburg at latest by the end of week. We can take Vienna and Berlin on our way home! I will be with the men at Portsmouth within an hour. Never mind our baggage; send it on afterwards.
In. For. (astounded). But what are you going to do?
Com. Gen. (with determination). Going to do! Why give them another thrashing! By-by, no time for talking! See you again soon!
[Exit hurriedly to beat the foe, and, strange to say, the object is subsequently attained—somehow!
AN ANTI-ONIONIST LIBERAL.—Mr. LEAKE lately made a radically plucky speech, and is in future to be known in the North as Cocky Leakey.