Now fleecing the tourist, now maddening the Times?

Know ye the shams of that ill-managed house,

Where the host ever bows, and the bills ever chouse;

Where the "wax-lights" that don't half illumine your room

Give a muttonish rather than waxy perfume;

Where, although you don't see half a waiter all day,

For "attendance" as much as a lawyer's you pay,

And find even then there's an extra for "Boots:"

Nor the porters in asking for liquids are mutes;

Where your "bottle of Sherry" (Cape, under disguise,)