Then come, great and sma', and hear the downfa'—
For a fa' down it will be for certain—
Of a' the wiseacres and gon'rals, an' a'
That dare to oppose the great Martin;
He'll settle their hash! their necks he will smash,
A' the College-bred gowks he will dazzel;
Ne mair shall false teachers o'er him cut a dash!
They are banish'd frae Canny Newcassel.
He can prove that a turkey-cock is not a Turk!
That a 'tatie is not a pine-apple;
He likewise can prove that boil'd goose is not pork,
And a black horse is not a grey dapple.
A' what he can prove—a' what he can do,
And bother the gon'rals—the wad-be's;
He likewise can prove that a boot's not a shoe,
And his cane's not a sausage frae Mawbey's![39]
Then come, great and sma', &c.
His Poems are sublime, tho' nyen o' them rhyme—
Why, he pays no attention to Morrow;[40]
Ne matter for that, still he makes them a' chyme,
For he hasn't his phrases to borrow!
Then proceed, mighty man, propagating thy plan,
To enlighten this dark age of reason!
May it spread like a blaze, with thy eloquence fann'd—
To doubt it, I hold it sheer treason.
Then come, great and sma', &c.
[39] A late famed Sausage-maker in the Old Flesh Market.
[40] Murray's Grammar.
THE GATESHEAD RADS.
To an old Tune.
T'other day aw was saunt'ring down the New Street,
And had turn'd to gan back, when whe should aw meet,
Reet plump i' the face, but sage Tommy Rav-ly,
Just come frae the council, and looking most gravely.
Wi' Tommy, says aw, what can be the matter?
Your plawd is aw dirt, and your teeth in a chatter;
Has your colleagues in office been using a broom,
And sooping the dirt all out of the room?