EMILY, JOHN, JAMES, AND I.
A DERBY LEGEND.
Emily Jane was a nursery maid,
James was a bold Life Guard,
John was a constable, poorly paid
(And I am a doggerel bard).
A very good girl was Emily Jane,
Jimmy was good and true,
John was a very good man in the main
(And I am a good man too).
Rivals for Emmie were Johnny and James,
Though Emily liked them both;
She couldn’t tell which had the strongest claims
(And I couldn’t take my oath).
But sooner or later you’re certain to find
Your sentiments can’t lie hid—
Jane thought it was time that she made up her mind
(And I think it was time she did).
Said Jane, with a smirk, and a blush on her face,
“I’ll promise to wed the boy
Who takes me to-morrow to Epsom Race!”
(Which I would have done, with joy).
From Johnny escaped an expression of pain,
But Jimmy said, “Done with you!
I’ll take you with pleasure, my Emily Jane!”
(And I would have said so too).
John lay on the ground, and he roared like mad
(For Johnny was sore perplexed),
And he kicked very hard at a very small lad
(Which I often do, when vexed).
For John was on duty next day with the Force,
To punish all Epsom crimes;
Young people will cross when they’re clearing the course
(I do it myself, sometimes).
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