"How does Sunflower stand?"

Sunflower was the horse I bet on, you know.

"I don't know," says he, "I'm only watching the first ten horses."

Just to liven things up a bit, I'll sing you a song entitled "Music On The Installment Plan; or, How Would You Like To Be The Piano Man?"

"I love thee, ah, yes, I love thee,"
She sang in notes of joy;
And like a darned big fool
He married the maiden coy.

But now she never shrieks the song
She howled in days of yore;
She never thumps the keyboard now
Until her thumbs are sore.

Alas! upon her latest grand,
She never more will play;
She failed with the installments,
And they've taken it away.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry when I sing that song, but I guess I'll laugh.