On errands of this grave intent,
Quæ Genus now and then was sent,
And how he did his plans arrange,
Or in what shape place the exchange;
How he contriv'd these sly affairs,
Paid soon, or lengthen'd the arrears, |
Of this we know not more nor less,
For we ne'er heard his tongue confess,
And 'twould be wasting time to guess. | } |
But, somehow, he contriv'd to please,
By grace or guile, old Master Squeeze,
And by some strange, peculiar art,
He gain'd upon the Us'rer's heart,
If an heart such a being owns,
Who chuckles when misfortune moans,
At least, when that is understood
To be a vessel fraught with good.
But to proceed, the mind's keen eye
Of Squeezing Jack, thought he could spy
In our Quæ Genus that quick sense,
Which might reward his confidence;
That wary, penetrating thought,
Which could not be too dearly bought,
And in his present, sickly trim,
Would be of golden use to him:
For he grew old and wanted aid,
In his nice calculating trade. |
In short, in every point of view,
As one who certain fancies knew,
The old man felt that he would do, | } |
And that he could his interest make
A station at the desk to take. |
| |
Not the first time on business bent,
Though 'twas the last by Molly sent,
Our Hero to the office went, | } |
With his redeeming coin to pay
And fav'rite gems to bear away,
He was desir'd to give an ear
To the proposal he should hear,
When Squeezing John in cautious strain
Did thus his secret wish explain.
"—From what I know and all I see,
You soon will be at liberty,
The gentry to whom you belong
Will not require your service long;
And 'twould be well were you to take
The offer which I now shall make:
That is, as you already see,
To come, my friend, and live with me.
I hope no thought your mind engages,
About such petty things as wages,
I would not wish you to receive
What common spendthrift masters give;
I exercise a better way
All such as serve me well to pay: |
Your bed and board will lib'ral be,
For you will live as well as me,
Such is my home œconomy. | } |
As for the service you will find
Its profits fully to your mind;
If you my interests understand,
Your own will follow hand in hand;
Nay, I my promise shall maintain,
That you a pretty fortune gain.
All I ask is, that you will be
The pattern of fidelity,
Which my observing eye has seen
To others you have lately been;
I have, my friend, but one word more,
And then my speechifying's o'er:
'Twill answer ev'ry purpose better
And I shall hold myself your debtor,
For reasons you shall plainly see,
If you will wear your livery,
For that can never be disgrace
Which soon will gain superior place." |
| |
Quæ Genus thought he could but try,
If but from curiosity,
Though some have said that then he view'd
The future freaks that he pursued.
Thus at the desk he soon was seated
To learn how folly could be cheated,
And to consent to play the rogue
With any spendthrift vice in vogue,
That did in pleasure's round perplex
In any form, in either sex.
The gains were great, nay almost certain,
While pride so slyly drew the curtain,
Indeed, it was so nicely clos'd,
That the rich schemes were ne'er expos'd.
—At first, a kind of gen'rous feeling,
A sense of honourable dealing,
Dispos'd him, with some doubts, to look
Into the Broker's daily book,
While he oft dipp'd his pen and thought,
Ere he the huge per-centage wrote:
Nay, he could pity the distress
Which did upon their bosoms press,
When, thus to pay for ill-bought pleasure,
They yielded up their gayest treasure.
—But then he mutter'd, "Where's the shame?
Others, like us, would do the same:
If we were now to shut up shop,
Others into the place would pop;
Extravagance would have its run
And fools speed on to be undone. |
And their sad wants would be supplied,
If John had laid his schemes aside,
Or had turn'd Methodist and died." | } |