“Ruin!” exclaimed Ray. “Why, Howard, what can you mean? What have you done?”
“Ruined myself—utterly—I don’t care what happens now.”
A struggle was going on in Ray’s breast. His face lost some of its severity.
“Tell me your whole story, Howard,” he said, in a somewhat altered tone. “Why did you come in here?”
“To steal—yes, give it the worst name—to steal. It was an act of madness, but what else was there for me to do? I had done almost everything else, and exposure and disgrace stared me in the face,” and Howard’s voice broke.
“Exposure! disgrace! For what?” asked Ray, in great concern. “Come, speak out. Tell me all.”
Howard was silent a moment.
“I might as well speak,” he said at length, “for everybody will know it soon.”
Ray and I remained silent, breathless and expectant, while a death-like stillness settled upon the room. After several minutes Howard roused himself slightly and began:
“I can scarcely bear to think of it. It has been growing a heavier weight on my mind for weeks past, haunting me at night, destroying my sleep, and depriving me of all peace, until to-day, when I could stand it no longer, and was about to—but I will tell you the whole story. My trouble really began away back in Freshman year. You remember that wealthy Cuban, Rapello, in the Senior class at that time. You remember his companion and roommate, Leisenring, and the whole crowd with whom they went, and you remember warning me against them as dangerous company. I felt able to take care of myself, and, as I was very much flattered by the attention of these upper classmen, I went with them constantly, as you know. You may not know, however, that a great deal of card playing was done in their rooms, and always for money. As my father is a clergyman, I was never allowed to look at cards at home, so I first became acquainted with the game in the company of those fellows. I became fascinated with it, and naturally too, for I was very fortunate, and won a great deal of money during Freshman year. During Sophomore year I was still more fortunate, and began to look upon my luck as assured, and to play with boldness and confidence. In Junior year the men whom I had associated with had nearly all graduated; so my next step was to form my room into a similar establishment to that of Rapello and Leisenring’s, and to draw in some of my companions and such of the under classmen as I could influence.