That told his love was married.

Then Guy a loaded pistol took:

"I'll kill myself!" he cried;

"Because I will not side with Sue,

I'll be a suicide."

When Susan heard him say these words,

She at her brains let fly:

And down, a corse, he sank, by Jove;

And down she sank—by Guy!

SEPTEMBER.[1837.
Soft, simple innocent!—how well you show
The gentle pastimes of your Cockney mates;
From him, who sparrows shoots with penny bow,
To him who, armed with Manton, braves the fates!
Alack! it grieves me that this shoeless boy
Should bootless follow the delusive joy;
For e'en the salt of attic wit doth fail
To catch a goose:—'and thereby hangs a tale.'
D.Great Events and Odd Matters.Prognostifications.
1Passenger-shooting begins. Old ladies and young children deemed fair game by cab and omnibus drivers.
2New Style. Eleven days stepped over.Furthermore,
3 △ ☿ ♍ ♅
4Bartlemy Fair."Fair is foul, and foul is fair,"let a
Dabble thro' the mud "and filthy air."
5 needy man
6 The sun of Bartlemy is well-nigh set, and his latest rays are dull as the Dutch metal that gilds his gingerbread kings. The last fair was a foul concern--the lions roared in a saw-dust solitude and the monkeys chatter'd to empty boxes.--"Just going to begin" was a never-ending cry, because the sights waited all day for want of see-ers--Mr. Merryman was sad, for people would not down with the dumps; and though he cried "Walk up! only twopence," he failed to "take his change out of that." In vain King Richard offer'd his kingdom for a horse; there were only a few asses within ear-ing. The sausages met with no stuffers, and the dog-meat pies remained unbitten, though the chimney- sweeps looked rabid at 'em. The hot spiced nuts met with a cold reception; the baked plum pudding was at no price current; and the ginger beer, though well up, would not go down. The pyramids of apples stood as unmoved as those of Egypt; but the nuts alone looked happy, for the people gave them "none of their jaw." The temperance societies have turned the table to a T;--Men who have left off gin do not support Mr. Gingell; and water-drinkers have no affection for fire-eaters. As to the gin temples, they found their day pretty well over, so they blazed at night, but their illuminated dials have made the world suspect "what's o'clock." Even the pickpockets failed of their harvest: for as the people abandoned the knaves in spirit, they were able to guard against the rogues in grain.☉ ♊
7essay to
8open the
9heart or
10draw
11the purse-
strings
12
♌ ♒ ♀ ♓
13
of a fair-
14
weather
15
friend,
16
☉ ☿ ♂
17
and shall
18
he not
19
forthwith
20
experience
21
☉ ♂
22
a cool and
23
frosty air,
24Hare Hunting.
☊ ♏ ♅ ♍
25
sufficient
26
♃ ♄ ♊
27
to blight
28
all the
29Quarter Day.
blossoms
30The landlord seizes for his rent, but can't be called a cheat,of hope?
For though he takes your stools and chairs, he leaves you a re-seat.