83. TIT FOR TAT
An old fellow in a neighboring town, who is original in all things, especially in excessive egotism, and who took part in the late war, was one day talking to a crowd of admiring listeners, and boasting of his many bloody exploits, when he was interrupted by the question:
"I say, old Joe, how many of the enemy did you kill during the war?"
"How many did I kill sir? how many enemies did I kill? Well, I don't know just 'zactly how many; but I know this much—I killed as many o' them as they did o' me!"
84. SLEEPING ON TOP
During a homeward trip of the "Henry Chauncey," from Aspinwall, the steerage passengers were so numerous as to make them uncomfortable. As for sleeping accommodation, it was aptly described by a Californian, who approached the captain, and said:
"I should like to have a sleeping-berth, if you please."
"Why, where have you been sleeping these last two nights since we left?"
"Wa'al, I've been sleeping a-top of a sick man; but he's better now, and won't stand it no longer!"