"I have put my hand into the hamper, I have looked on the sacred barley, I have eaten out of the drum. I have drunk and am well pleased. I have said, 'Knox Ompax,' and it is finished."
The effect was magical, the astonished Irishman fell back; his friends began to question him. "What barley?" "Where's the hamper?" "What have you been drinking?" and Shelley walked away unmolested.
94. OBEYING ORDERS
When General Sickles, after the second battle of Bull Run, assumed command of a division of the Army of the Potomac, he gave an elaborate farewell dinner to the officers of his old Excelsior Brigade.
"Now, boys, we will have a family gathering," he said to them, as they assembled in his quarters. Pointing to the table, he continued: "Treat it as you would the enemy."
As the feast ended, an Irish officer was discovered by Sickles in the act of stowing away three bottles of champagne in his saddle-bags.
"What are you doing, sir," gasped the astonished General.
"Obeying orders, sir," replied the captain, in a firm voice: "You told us to treat the dinner as we would the enemy, and you know, General, what we can't kill we capture."
95. A SPEECH FROM THE REAR PLATFORM
An Irish street-car conductor called out shrilly to the passengers standing in the aisle: