The Congregational Journal, Concord, N. H., concludes a somewhat severe review, in the following emphatic manner:—
"The chapter wanting in the life of 'Ruth Hall,' perhaps could be furnished by Mr. Samuel P. Farrington, of Chicago, Ill., if he was her second husband till he obtained a divorce from her; and that such is the fact, who will deny? Who that knows will take the responsibility of denying that 'Ruth Hall' alias 'Fanny Fern,' is the daughter of Deacon Nathaniel Willis, of Boston, and that N. P. Willis is her brother? And who will deny that her first husband was a Mr. Eldredge, whose father was a physician, and is now dead? Is not the 'old Doctor' the father of 'Harry?' Is not 'Mr. Ellet' the father of 'Ruth,' and is not 'Hyacinth' her brother? are questions which she will not answer in the negative. We shall not ourselves attempt any description of this book, but having knowledge of some facts in the history of its author, and believing that the outlines above quoted are just, we have encumbered our columns with the matter. If by so doing, we shall be the means of increasing the readers of 'Ruth Hall,' the responsibility of reading such an abominable production will rest on themselves and not us."
LIII.
ANOTHER FERN.
I've been reading the Bible, to-day, and it strikes me that our foremothers were not very correct old ladies. Who flirted with the old serpent? How came Sampson's hair cut off and his peepers extinguished? Who perforated Jael's head with tenpenny nails? How came Jonah sent on a whale-ing voyage? Who helped Ananias tell fibs? Who put Job up to swearing? Who raised a perfect hurricane in good old Abram's house! Who danced John the Baptist's head off his shoulders, hey? I'd like to have you notice (that's all,) what a stock we all sprung from.
"If they weren't tee-totally depraved, may I never find out which of 'em I descended from! They didn't seem to have the least consideration for future generations 'long since unborn.' Now I don't calculate, myself, to feel responsible for their capers. I've read somewhere, in Byron, I believe, that every washtub must stand on its own pedestal! (or something like that.) I don't believe in saddling my shoulders with their old-fashioned transgressions.
"Curious, though, isn't it? the mischief women make in the world? Great pity Noah hadn't set Mrs. Noah adrift when he 'took one of each kind in the ark." I should rather have stood my chance for a ducking, than to have been shut up with such a 'promiskus' men-agerie. Noah was a worthy old gentleman. No mention made of his getting tipsy but once, I believe."
Nota Bene.—We cannot help being a little amused at Fanny's comical want of Scriptural information. Our Bible represents Jael as a woman, not by any means "perforated with tenpenny nails," though she did try the "perforating" experiment with excellent success, on the head of Sisera "the captain of Jabin's army." Oh, wondrous Fanny, those early Sabbath-school lessons must have been long ago forgotten!
LIV.
"THE BEST OF MEN HAVE THEIR FAILINGS."
Fanny doesn't think so. She expresses her opinion as follows:—
"I wish I could ever take up a paper that endorsed my liberal sentiments. I've always warped to the opinion that good men were as safe as homœopathic pills. You don't suppose they ever patronize false words or false weights, false measures or false yardsticks? You don't suppose they ever slander their neighbors after making a long-winded exhortation in a vestry meeting? You don't suppose they ever lift their beavers to a long purse, and turn their backs on a thread-bare coat? You don't suppose they ever bestow a charity to have it trumpeted in the newspapers? You don't suppose when they trot devoutly to meeting twice a day on Sunday, that they overhaul their ledgers in the intermission? You don't suppose they ever put doubtful-looking bank bills in the contribution box? You don't suppose they ever pay their minister's salary in consumptive hens and damaged turkies? I wish people were not so uncharitable and suspicious. It disgusts me with human nature.