From Snotty to Sub

by Wolston B. C. W. Forester

(Note by a captious mother: From which remark we may safely assume that grammar was not included in the examinations!)

So far, so good—but the end was not yet.

On the following day the navigation oral was due, and as this did not take place until the afternoon, we spent the whole morning poring over navigation manuals. But we might just as well have spared ourselves the trouble, for you can't get a quart into a pint pot, and we had already absorbed all the knowledge on this subject that our brains seemed capable of holding.

When we arrived on board the ship where this particular exam. was being held we found that candidates from other ships were still in the throes and so we had to wait. But this was all to the good, for in the brief pauses between their interviews we were able to glean from them some valuable tips as to what kind of question to expect.

When at last our turn came I was sent first to the officer who was examining in chart work. He handed me a chit on which was set out a problem dealing with the finding of a ship's position when in sight of land, and left me to tackle it while he questioned another candidate on chart markings, etc. The problem was as follows: To find the noon position of an imaginary ship, somewhere in the Channel, her true course being (so far as I can remember) S. 70° W. From the ship in question the bearing of Dungeness Light-Vessel at 10.30 was N. 10° E., and of Owers Lightship at 11.15, N. 35° W. true. The deviation of the ship's compass was 9° E., and the tide was setting S. 75° W. true.

Having worked it out as I thought correctly, I asked Commander —— to look at it. He did so; and then asked me to demonstrate the steps I had taken to obtain my result. Then I at once perceived that in laying off the course I had applied the variation the wrong way, and consequently my explanation took this rather ludicrous form: "Well, sir ... I laid off the course here.... Oh no!... I see that's wrong ... it should have been here.... Then I transferred to ... Oh no! That's wrong again.... I cut the wrong line.... Then I laid off the tide to this point ... but I see that I should have laid it off to that...." And so on, correcting myself all along the line. However, by these peculiar methods I apparently satisfied him that my knowledge of the subject, if badly expressed, was sufficiently sound, and he eventually passed me.

My next examiner was one of those splendid people who somehow contrive to put a question in such a way as to closely suggest, if not actually to convey, the answer, and so I got through without much difficulty. In all we were examined in navigation by five different officers, but met with few real stumbling-blocks, and in pleasing contrast to the previous day returned to our ship in a very optimistic frame of mind.

The whole of the succeeding day was devoted to gunnery. In the forenoon, turret and 4-inch-gun drill—at which I fear we did not distinguish ourselves; but the knowledge that the Snotties from another ship, who were examined with us, had done even worse, gave us some slight consolation.

In the afternoon came control, ammunition, etc., and for these we had to repair on board the ill-fated Vanguard, which, but three days later, fell a victim to that disastrous explosion which destroyed her and so many of her gallant crew. The only one of her officers on the Board was her Gunnery Commander, who, I am glad to say, was among those who were saved. Thanks to him, this examination, although commonly held to be one of the most trying, was rendered comparatively easy, for he was one of those officers—alas, but too rarely met with in the Service—who do not believe in expecting too much from a Snotty, and are inclined to judge him rather in the kindly light of future promise than in that of present performance.

Two more orals were still before us, namely, torpedo and engineering. The former was held on board our own ship, and the latter in that in which the seamanship had taken place. Our Commander, "T.," was President of the Torpedo Board, and doubtless his verdict was based on our everyday work as he knew it, rather than on the immediate result of the examination, for he let us down lightly.