SCENE IX
The same and BOLSHÓV
BOLSHÓV. Ha, you here, sir? What's this you're preaching here?
RISPOLÓZHENSKY. [Bows] I hope you're well, Samsón Sílych.
USTÍNYA NAÚMOVNA. Why, my jewel! You seem to be growing thin. Or have you been crippled somehow?
BOLSHÓV. [Sitting down] Must be I've caught cold, or perhaps my blood's in a bad way.
AGRAFÉNA KONDRÁTYEVNA. Well, Sysóy Psoich, and what happened to him next?
RISPOLÓZHENSKY. Some other time, Agraféna Kondrátyevna, some other time I'll finish telling; I'll run in some day about dusk and tell you about it fully.
BOLSHÓV. What's the matter with you; trying to be sanctimonious? Ha, ha, ha! It's time you came to!
AGRAFÉNA KONDRÁTYEVNA. There, now, you're beginning! You won't let us have a heart-to-heart talk together.
BOLSHÓV. Heart-to-heart talk! Ha, ha, ha! But you just ask him how his case was lost from court; there's the story he'll tell you better.
RISPOLÓZHENSKY. On the contrary, it was not lost! That's not true, Samsón
Sílych!
BOLSHÓV. Then what did they turn you out for?
RISPOLÓZHENSKY. This is why, my dear Agraféna Kondrátyevna. I took one case home with me from the court; on the way my friend and I just stepped aside—mortal man is weak; well, you understand—if you'll permit me to say it, into the wine-shop, so to speak. I left it there, and when I was rather tipsy, I suppose, I forgot it. What of that? It might happen to anybody. Afterwards, my dear lady, they missed that case in court; we looked and looked, and I went home twice with the bailiff—still we couldn't find it. They wanted to bring me to trial, but suddenly I remembered: it must be, now, I forgot that thing and left it in the wine-shop. I went there with the bailiff, and there it was.
AGRAFÉNA KONDRÁTYEVNA. I declare! That may happen to a sober man as well as to one who drinks. What a pity!
BOLSHÓV. How is it they didn't send you off to Kamchatka?
RISPOLÓZHENSKY. To Kamchatka! But why, permit me to ask you, why should they send me off to Kamchatka?
BOLSHÓV. Why? Because you're drunk and disorderly. Do they have to show you any indulgence? Why, you'll just kill yourself drinking.
RISPOLÓZHENSKY. On the contrary, they spared me. You see, my dear Agraféna Kondrátyevna, they wanted to try me for that very thing—I went immediately to our general, and flopped at his feet! "Your Excellency!" I said. "Don't ruin me! I've a wife," I said, "and little children!" "Well," he said, "deuce take you; they won't strike a man when he's down: tender your resignation, so I shan't see you here." So he spared me. What now! God bless him! He doesn't forget me even now; sometimes I run in to see him on a holiday: "Well," says he, "how are you, Sysóy Psoich?" "I came, your Excellency, to wish you a happy holiday." So, I went to the Troitsa monastery not long ago, and brought him a consecrated wafer. I'll just take a thimbleful, Agraféna Kondrátyevna. [Drinks.
AGRAFÉNA KONDRÁTYEVNA. With my compliments, my dear sir. Ustinya Naúmovna, let's you and me go out; the samovar is ready, I suppose; I'll show you that we have something new for the wedding outfit.
USTÍNYA NAÚMOVNA. I suppose, my jewel, you have heaps of stuff ready.
AGRAFÉNA KONDRÁTYEVNA. Why certainly. The new materials have come, and it seems as if we didn't have to pay money for them.
USTÍNYA NAÚMOVNA. What's the use of talking, my pearl! You have your own shop, and it's as if they grew in your garden. [They go out.