A V. Oh, but I want them together.
Me. I’m afraid we never sell seats together, Madam. The Lord Chamberlain——
A V. Oh, but——
Me. May I ask why you want to see this play, Madam?
A V. I can’t hear you.... Hullo!
Me. I mean, between ourselves, it’s a thoroughly bad adaptation of a thoroughly bad foreign play thoroughly badly acted by a rotten lot of actors. Letty Loo is perfectly awful, and there’s no room for your legs, unless you would care for a box, and there isn’t one if you would; so if I were you I should stay quietly at home with Henry. Au revoir!
IV
A Voice (most important). Hullo! Is that the Treasury?
Me (sweetly feminine). Treasury speaking.
A V. (as if the end of the world was in sight). I want to speak to the Prime Minister’s Private Secretary.