When is a thief like a reporter? When he takes notes.
When is a book like a prisoner in the States of Barbary? When it is bound in Morocco.
Why is a retired carpenter like a lecturer on natural philosophy? Because he is an ex-plainer.
Why are those who quiz ladies’ bustles very slanderous persons? Because they talk of them behind their backs.
Why is a gardener better paid than any other tradesman? Because he has most celery (salary).
Why is my servant Betsy like a race-course? Because she is a Bet in place (betting-place).
Why is a most persevering admirer of a coquette like an article she carries in her pocket? Because he is her hanker-chief (handkerchief).
Why is a torch like the ring of a chain? Because it is a link.
Why is a handsome and fascinating lady like a slice of bread? Because she is often toasted.
Why does a Quaker resemble a fresh and sprightly horse? Because he is full of nays (neighs).