Mrs. Profiteer: "No, we ain't got no views. We didn't take no camera; it's so common."

* * *

A GOOD MATCH

Proprietor: "What made that customer walk out? Did you offend him?"

Assistant: "I don't know. He said he wanted a hat to suit his head and I showed him a soft hat."

* * *

LIFE'S BIGGEST PROBLEM

Old Job: "The best way to get the most out of life is to fall in love with a great problem or a beautiful woman!"

Old Steve: "Why not choose the latter and get both?"

* * *