“Yes, once when we first met and another time she hit me on the head with a rolling pin.”


“I suppose she has something saved for a rainy day?”

“Oh, yes; an umbrella and a mackintosh.”


Two young ladies took a long tramp through the woods. Who brought him back?


“Hello! waiter, where is that ox tail soup?”

“Coming, sir—half a minute.”

“Confound you! How slow you are.”