“Why?”
“Well, if I don’t like her I can lick her.”
A schoolma’am once caught the janitor in a falsehood and thereupon asked him where he supposed he’d go if he told such stories. The janitor replied that wherever he went he expected he’d be making fires for the school-teachers.
A drunken barber while shaving a minister cut him. The minister said: “You see what drink does.”
Drunken Barber—“Yes. It makes the skin verra tender.”
I saw a terrible accident happen while I was in Chicago. A street-car run over a little girl and cut both of her hands off. I ran to her and was going to pick her up, when she hollered, “Hands off!”