Why is a married man like a fire? Because he provokes his wife by going out at night.

Why is a pig’s brain larger than any other animal’s? Because he has a hog’s head full.

Where was the first Adams Express Company located? In the Garden of Eden, when Eve was created.

What is the difference between a young lady and a mouse? One charms the he’s, the other harms the cheese.

Why are men like facts? Because they are stubborn things.

What is the difference between a gardener and a Chinaman? One keeps the lawn wet, the other keeps the lawn dry (laundry).

Why is a young lady’s age after she has reached twenty-five like a floral wedding bell? Because it is never told.

When is a door not a door? When it’s an egress (a negress).

Why is Patti like a jeweler? Because she deals in precious tones (precious stones).

When is a bee a great nuisance? When it is a humbug.