When is a doctor most annoyed? When he is out of patients.
Why is a poor acquaintance better than a rich one? A friend in need is a friend indeed.
What is there remarkable about a bee? Why, ordinarily it has but little to say, yet generally carries its point.
Why is the first chicken of a brood like the mainmast of a ship? Because it’s a little ahead of the main hatch.
How many persons can a deaf and dumb man tickle? He can ges-tickle-eight (gesticulate).
What is the easiest way to keep water out of the house? Omit to pay your water tax.
What is it that is queer about flowers? They shoot before they have pistils.
What is the best form for a soldier? Uniform.
What is the best uniform for a soldier? Right dress.
When does a dog become larger and smaller? When let out at night, and taken in in the morning.