When is a man of greatest use at the dinner-table? When he is a spoon.
What is the difference between a rejected and an accepted lover? One misses the kisses and the other kisses the misses.
What is the difference between a church deacon and a little rag-a-muffin? One passes the sasser (saucer) and the other sasses the passer.
Why is a lover like a knocker? Because he is bound to adore (a door).
In what colored ink should we write our secrets? In violet (inviolate).
Why is a young lady like an arrow? Because she can’t go off without a bow (beau), and is in a quiver till she gets one.
If a young lady fell into a well why couldn’t her brother help her out? Because, how could he be a brother and assist her (a sister) too?
If all the women went to China, where would the men go? To Pekin.
Why does a Russian soldier wear brass buttons on his coat, and an Austrian soldier wear steel ones? To keep his coat buttoned.
What is the difference between an old penny and a new dime? Nine cents.