Why should alchemists and astrologers be females? They are often Ann Elizas and Charlotte Anns from birth.
How does Patrick propose to get over his single blessedness? By proposing to Bridge-it.
Why is a kiss like a sermon? Because it requires two heads and an application.
Why should a man named Benjamin marry a girl named Annie? Because he would then be Bennie-fitted, and she Annie-mated.
State why a donkey browsing in a bed of thistles appears ill. Because he's a little down in the mouth, and looks rather seedy about the face.
Why am I, when prudently laying by money, like myself when foolishly squandering it? Because in either case I am—ass.
When is a teapot like a kitten? When you're teasin' it (your tea's in it).
Why does a puss purr? For an obvious pur-puss (purpose).
When is a fruit-stalk like a strong swimmer? When it stems the currants.
Why is lip-salve like a chaperon? Because it's meant to keep the chaps off.