What is the best way to keep a man's love? Not to return it.
Why is a wedding ring like eternity? Because it has no beginning and no end.
Why does a young lady prefer her mother's fortune to her father's? Because, though she likes patrimony, she still better likes matrimony.
Why is a deceptive woman like a seamstress? Because she is not what she seams (seems).
When does a man stand a good chance of being completely sewn up? When he has a stitch in his side.
Why does a dressmaker never lose her hooks? Because she has an eye to each of them.
What is the difference between a farmer and a seamstress? The farmer gathers what he sows, while the seamstress sews what she gathers.
If we were going to kill a conversational goose, what vegetable would she allude to? Ah!-spare-a-goose! (asparagus).
What is the best thing to do to enjoy the happiness of courting? To get a little gal-an'-try (gallantry).
How is it that the affections of young ladies, notwithstanding that they may protest and vow constancy, are always doubtful? Because they are only miss givings (misgivings).