What have tongues but talk not? Wagons.
Why do we all go to bed? Because the bed will not come to us.
What is higher and handsomer when the head is off? A pillow.
What is the best thing to make in a hurry? Haste.
Why do dentists make good politicians? Because they have a great pull.
If a tailor and a goose are on the top of a monument, what is the quickest way for the tailor to get down? Pluck the goose.
If I walk into a room full of people and place a new penny upon the table in full view of the company, what does the coin do? It looks round.
Why is a mouse like hay? Because the cat'll eat it (cattle).
Why is a madman equal to two men? Because he is one beside himself.
Which member of Congress wears the largest hat? The one who has the largest head.