What is smaller than a mite's mouth? What goes into it.
Why is love always represented as a child? Because he never reaches the age of discretion.
Why is a man hanged better than a vagabond? Because he has a visible means of support.
What is the difference between photography and whooping-cough? The one makes facsimiles, the other sick families.
Why is a dog like a man four feet ten inches tall? Because he stands over four feet.
Why does the mayor order the saloons closed after a great fire? That the people may not try to drown their losses.
What is it which more people lie under than upon? The gravestone.
What is it that opens to all comers, advertises only the doctors, and yet is good for everything that ails you? The grave.
Why is a bride, weary of her apartment home, like a wrecked automobile? They've both got flat tire.
Why is a gardener like a detective-story writer? Because he works up his plot.