Husband and wife receive together at a golden-wedding. Sons and daughters welcome the guests, but do not necessarily stand beside their parents. They should have a watchful eye upon the latter, however, to see that they do not become fatigued. One advantage of the afternoon reception for a golden-wedding is the well-known tendency of the guests to concentrate in the dining-room, thus giving the host and hostess an opportunity to sit down and rest if they are tired. They remain in the drawing-room, any refreshments they may desire being brought to them. These will be the same as at any afternoon tea or reception. Some solid dishes such as salads and oysters may be served, and there may be a wedding-cake.
The golden-wedding bride may wear any color she pleases except black. The ugly fashion of dressing elderly women in hard black is fortunately on the wane, since it is extremely unbecoming to them. Delicate tints of lavender and gray, trimmed with soft ruffles or lace, are appropriate for the bride of fifty years. The groom wears formal afternoon dress, black frock or cutaway coat, with high waistcoat to match, dark trousers, and lavender scarf. If the bride carries a bouquet, it should, in our opinion, be of violets, orchids, or golden flowers rather than white ones, although some authorities favor the latter.
The fifteenth, crystal, and the twentieth, china, weddings are occasionally observed. Friends may celebrate them informally by a surprise party, at which gifts of porcelain or glassware are presented to a couple whose china closets need replenishing.
VI
HOUSE AND CHURCH WEDDINGS
Dress for Bride, Bridegroom, Bridesmaids, Ushers, and Other Members of the Bridal Party—Dress of Guests—Gifts and How to Present Them—Etiquette of House and Church Weddings—Wedding Breakfasts and Receptions—Entertaining Out-of-town Guests.
A GOWN of white satin, with veil of tulle, plain or lace-trimmed, or of real lace, has long been the conventional bridal dress. While the bodice may, in accordance with the present style, be somewhat cut out at the neck and the sleeves reach only to the elbow, it must never be full décolleté unless the wedding takes place in the evening. The skirt should have a train varying in length with the fashion, but never so long as to interfere with the bride’s movements. Several yards of satin trailing upon the floor will result in pulling her head back at every step, producing a very awkward and ugly effect. A creamy tint is more becoming to most young women than a bluish shade of white. Some brides prefer silk, fine organdie muslin, chiffon, or other soft material. Artificial orange flowers are usually worn in the hair and sometimes on the dress, the natural blossoms being very difficult to procure. It is wise to engage a hair-dresser to put on the wedding-veil, since this is a task requiring special skill. If it is to be worn over the face, a separate piece of tulle should be used for the purpose. The maid of honor, or first bridesmaid, takes this off when the bride turns to walk down the aisle at the conclusion of the ceremony. White stockings with white satin or kid slippers, long white gloves, and bouquet complete the costume. The “shower” effect, obtained by fastening flowers at intervals on long streamers of narrow ribbon, has, in the opinion of the writer, an extremely artificial look; but many people admire it. The bridegroom usually gives the bride some piece of jewelry to be worn on the eventful day. Her ornaments should be of diamonds, pearls, or other white or colorless stones.
The bridegroom appears in formal morning or, as it is sometimes called, formal afternoon dress, if the ceremony takes place in the daytime. Fashion long demanded that he should wear a frock-coat, but this imposing garment has suffered something of an eclipse, the cutaway often replacing it. The tailors, in solemn convocation, recently decided that the frock-coat could not altogether be banished, since it is popular with the great statesmen of our nation. Whichever style of coat the groom selects, he wears with it a high-cut waistcoat to match or a white one, dark striped trousers, lavender, gray, or white silk four-in-hand tie, patent-leather shoes, and high silk hat. A fancy waistcoat of another color is sometimes worn, but it must not be gay or loud. If gloves are worn, they should be light-gray or white. His white boutonnière bouquet is the gift of the bride, who bestows similar decorations on the ushers. These gentlemen are all dressed alike, their costume and that of the best man corresponding to the bridegroom’s. The bride’s father will probably prefer a frock-coat with waistcoat to match. As a rule all the men present at a wedding in the morning or afternoon don formal morning dress. In the summer sack-coats and straw hats are occasionally worn at a country wedding.
If the ceremony takes place in the evening, the groom and ushers appear in black swallow-tail coats, with trousers to match, low-cut white waistcoats, narrow white lawn ties, and pumps or patent-leather shoes. The dress of the other men present is the same, though some may prefer to wear a black dress-waistcoat to match the suit.
The bridesmaids’ costume is usually of some pretty, light color and soft material. This should, like the bride’s, be only slightly cut down in the neck, in the daytime. The inevitable hat is an important feature, and often a charming “creation.” Long white gloves and a bouquet complete the costume. The latter is the gift of the bridegroom, and usually matches or tones in with the dress or its trimmings. The bride’s mother wears lilac, gray, black-and-white, mauve, or some quiet color that is becoming to her, with bonnet or hat to match. She must carefully avoid any affectation of youth in her costume, since this would be in poor taste and would inevitably cause unfavorable comment. Hence the material of her gown is of heavier fabric than that chosen by the younger members of the bridal party. Silk, satin, velvet, brocade are all appropriate. The bodice should be practically high in the neck or only slightly cut out, although it may have a lace yoke and trimmings. The bride’s mother usually removes her wrap before going up the aisle, an usher carrying it for her. The groom’s mother wears a similar costume, the young girls of both families appearing in pretty high-necked frocks of light color, with dressy hats. No member of the bridal party should appear in mourning garb. The widowed mother, even, lays it aside for the day.