TEMPER. Something you should keep, otherwise the man you show it to may hand it back to you with a short-arm jab.
TEMPTATION. The banana peel in a man's brain that causes him to slip.
THE LAUGH. Something which should always be on the other fellow.
TO-MORROW. The only day in the year that appeals to a lazy man.
THERMOMETER. A machine invented by a drugstore proprietor for the purpose of driving humanity to drink.
TROUBLE. The only thing which a man borrows and wants to pay back in a hurry. The place where a man finds his head when he loses it.
TROUBLE HUNTER. A man who always comes home with a game-bag full.