| IT isn't what a man can see through the holes
in a peek-a-boo waist that makes the garment
attractive, but what he tries to see
and can't.
A MAN who would turn up his nose at an
overdone chop or an overdone biscuit
will swallow an overdone compliment with
the keenest relish.
TOBACCO and love and olives are all acquired
tastes; your first smoke makes you
sick, your first olive tastes bitter, and your
first love affair makes you unhappy.
MOST men fancy that being married to a
woman means merely seeing her in the
mornings instead of in the evenings.
A REFORMED rake is like a made-over
hat or made-over tea—he has lost his
style and his flavor.
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| A MAN is always advising his wife to wear
common-sense shoes, but that isn't the
kind he turns around in the street to stare
after.
IT isn't the man who is willing to stay up late
to talk to you, but the one who is willing to
get up early to work for you, that you
ought to waste your powder on.
WHEN a woman is pretty and married an
optimistic man can always console himself
with the thought that perhaps she is
unhappy because her husband doesn't appreciate
her.
MEN used to marry good cooks and flirt
with chorus girls; now they marry
chorus girls and hire good cooks.
IT'S an ill wind that teaches a man the value
of hatpins.
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| IF WE could all pay the price of matrimony
in a lump sum it wouldn't be so bad; but
paying it in daily instalments is what
wearies us.
A MARRIED man soon learns enough not
to let the barber put lilac water on his
hair; it's wonderful how sharp they get
about exciting suspicion.
LOVE always comes to a man as a surprise;
he feels like a person who has been hit in
the dark, and his one thought is for a
means of escape.
IF THE average husband were half as attentive,
solicitous and devoted as his coachman,
there would be fewer scandals of the
drawing-room-stable variety.
FLIRTING is the gentle art of making a
man feel pleased with himself.
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| SOME men are such bunglers at love-making
that they cannot make a sentimental
remark without tripping over it, or take
your hand or a kiss without making you
feel as though they had taken your pocketbook.
THE average man's ideas of what a woman
ought to be are as old-fashioned and set as
two china vases on a parlor mantel.
IT takes a mighty dishonorable man not to
lie to a woman about where he saw her husband
the night before.
NEAR-LOVE-MAKING is the scientific
masculine method of saying a great deal
and promising nothing.
IT'S so hard to reform a man when he hasn't
any great fault but just a little of all of
them.
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A MAN who devotes his youth to ambition and cuts out love, finds out that he has been eating the bread of life without any jam on it. IT'S so easy for a man to get engaged that he is always disagreeably surprised when he finds out how difficult it is to get disengaged. A MAN buttons a woman's dress up the back with almost the same grace and alacrity that a woman displays in climbing a barbed wire fence. IT isn't Cupid, but cupidity, that is to blame for those unhappy international marriages. A MAN is absolutely certain that a woman is perfectly proper when she refuses to kiss him because in his simple, childlike vanity he can't think of any other reason why she shouldn't want to. |