Q.–What iz the capacity ov an omnibus?
A.–The same az a grave yard, it takes all that cums.
Now chop doun oats.
And hew doun barley,
Rize with the sun,
And go tew bed arly.
SEPTEMBER MONOGRAPH.
September iz named after "Septus" which thrashed out into Amerikan, means seven. I wouldn't take 500 dollars for the latin i know, and i don't kno mutch nuther. Sept. iz a lakadaisikal month, mello az the dekayed side of a punkin, and as sensitive az a boarding school miss, during her fust quarter in french. Natur makes her will this month—hogs root violently—birds hold convenshuns, and adjourn down south—tree toads boost each other up trees and warble sum anthems—katydids chew musick and spit it out freely, and bull frogs post their books.
MORE ADVICE TEW YOUNG SPORTSMEN.
In shooting at a deer that looks like a calf, always aim so az tew miss it if it iz a calf, and to hit it if it iz a deer.
In fishing for krabs, use yure fingers for bait, yu kan feel them when they fust bite.