No doubt, Josh Billings
Q.–What is wealth?
A.–Baggage at the risk of the owner.
The carrion crow sits straddle the fence,
Trying az hard az he can to weep,
Az he thinks ov death and its consequence
To spavined hosses and rickety sheep.
THE LOAFING RACCON.
The Raccon iz a native amerikan. His family consists ov one wife, and three children, who liv with him on the inside ov a tree. During the winter he ties himself up in a hard knot, and lays down bi hiz fire side. When spring opens, he opens too, and goes out tew see how the chickens hav wintered. I never knew a raccon tew want enny thing long, that he could steal quick. I hav had tame coons bi the dozen, but i dont advise enny boddy tew cultivate coons; they want as much waiting on az a blind mule on a tow path, and thare aint enny more real proffit in them, than thare iz in a stock dividend, on the Erie railroad.
HOME DOINGS.
Tew freshen a salt mackerel,—tow him one summer behind a steam bote.