During hiz old age he winters in the alms-houses, and summers in the sugar hogsheds, and when he comes tew die he iz 342 buried in a dich, like an omnibus hoss, with hiz old shoes on.
This iz a trew ackount ov the life and adventures ov the ordinary loafer, and yet there are thousands ov human kritters coming onto the platform ov life every six months whoze only ambishun iz to be successful loafers.
The loafer kares nothing for publik opinyun, and this alone, will make any man a loafer.
The loafer rather covets disgrace ov all kinds, and when a man gits az low down az this, he haz got az low down az he kan git without digging.
THE PROJEKTOR.
The projektor iz a man with one idee, and that idee iz often like a paving stun, the hardest kind ov a thing tew hatch out, and when it iz hatched out, yu kan’t alwus tell what kind ov a breed the thing iz.
He haz been bizzy at work for the last 4 thousand years trieing tew bild perpetual moshun, and haz cum within 3 quarters ov an inch ov it sevral times, but alwus slips up jist az he reaches out tew grab it.
He haz dun sum dredful good things for mankind, but too often iz ov no more use in the world, than an extra pump iz.
The projektor iz alwus a man ov genius, but hiz genius iz frequently like the genius ov a goose, thare ain’t no one kan beat them at standing on one legg.
I hav known theze breed ov pholks tew drag out a long life, richer in their own estimashun than Crœsus, and poorer in the opinyun ov others than Lazarus.