They seldum reap enny gain from their invenshuns, and if ever they do diskover perpetual moshun, they will sell the principle tew sum kunning kuss, for 17 or 18 dollars, and starve tew death on the glory ov it.
I hav known several ov these poor phellows in mi life, and only knew them tew pitty them, for they are az tender, all over, az spring lam, and az eazy tew cheat az a blind baby.
I hav a friend who iz a projektor. I kant tell what partikular pholly he iz at work at now, but sum one I am sure, for 343 thare aint on the whole arth, a more bizzy kritter than the man, who iz sure that to-morrow will put the finishing touches tew hiz pattent rite plan, for threading the rong end ov a kambrik needle, or his resipee for making soft sope out ov calfs liver.
But we kant spare the projektors, all that we can hope for iz, that too menny ov them wont spend a whole life in making a juse harp that will play Yankee doodle backwards, and finally die, and leave the tune haff finished.
THE KONDEM PHOOL.
Thare iz two kinds ov phools, at the date ov this article, laying around loose in the world, one iz the natral, and the other iz the kondem.
Thare iz sum other kind ov phools besides these, which I shall tutch lightly before I git thru.
The natral phool kant help it, he iz born like the daizy, bi the side ov the road, just to nod, and to be sport for the winds.
He haz no destiny to phill, that we know ov, but hiz Heavenly Father will care for him, for He cares for the koarse weed and the rank thissell.
The kondem phool iz a self-made man, and iz entitled tew all the credit ov the job.