My wife iz glad ov it.
I am out 2 vases, a quart of nu milk, and one tarrier.
My wife sez, if i ever buy another rat pup, she will put him tew immediate soak in the cistern at onst.
Mi wife iz one ov them kind ov wimmin that don’t make enny statements unless they are true, so yu needn’t send me enny more tarrier.
“Fred.”—Yu aint obliged tu ask a gals mother, if yu ma go home with her from a partee, git the gals endorsement, and sale in; it iz proper enuff tu ask her tu take yure arm, but yu haint got no rite tu put yure arm around her waste, unless yu 488 meet a Bear on the rode, and then yu are bound tu take yure arm away, just az soon az the Bear gits safely by.
“Snyder.”—Rats originally cum from Norway, and i wish they had originally staid thare. They are about as uncalled for as a pain in the small ov the back. They kan be domestikated dreadful eazy, that is, as far as gitting in cupboards, and eating cheese, and knawing pie, is concerned.
The best way tew domestikate them that ever I saw, is tew surround them gently, with a steel trap; yu kan reason with them then tew grate advantage.
Rats are migratorious, they migrately whare ever they hav a mind to.
Pisen is also good for rats; it softens their whole moral naturs.