He then went on to tell me that the soldiers of the First and Tenth Armies, having heard of my work, had bought for me two icons, one of the Holy Mother and the other of Saint George, both of silver, framed in gold. They had telegraphed instructions to embroider two standards with appropriate inscriptions. Kerensky, the General told me, had thought of making the presentation a solemn occasion and had had my record in the army fully investigated, after which he had decided to buy a gold cross to present to me at the same time.
“Now what will become of this ceremony if you do not pacify your women?” the General asked.
I was, naturally, flattered by what Polovtzev told me, but I considered that duty came first and that I must not give in for the sake of the honours promised to me, in spite of the assurances he gave me that he would order the women to ask my pardon if I consented to form a committee.
“I would not keep the rebels in the Battalion for anything,” I said. “Once having been insulted by them, I shall always consider them prejudicial to the organization. They would sap my strength here and would disgrace me at the front. The purpose of the Battalion was to set an example to the demoralized men. Give them a committee, and all is lost. I shall have the same state of things as in the army. The disintegration there is a sufficient reason for my determination not to introduce the new system.”
“Yes, I agree with you that the committees are a curse,” confided the General. “But what is to be done?”
“I know this much, that I, for one, will have nothing to do with committees,” I declared emphatically.
The General jumped to his feet, struck the table with his fist and thundered:
“And I order you to form a committee!”
I jumped up as well, I also struck the table and declared loudly:
“I will not! I started this work on condition that I should be allowed to run the Battalion as I saw fit and without any committees.”