Lieutenant (to his orderly):—“You idiot, what are you thinking of, to clean my drinking cup with a handkerchief?”
Servant:—“Beg your pardon, sir, but it is my own.”
The Cold Ice
“Pray, tell me, Captain, why you are staring so hard at my plate?”
“I am admiring that ice, Fräulein, that can keep so cold in view of your charms.”
A Charitable Institution
“Have not seen you for a long time, Count. Been on leave?”
“Oh, yes,—been two weeks in Potsdam. Aunt died suddenly.”
“Well, well,—congratulations. Inherit anything?”
“Not I; the old aunt left everything to charitable institutions. Stupid idea! As if a German Officer of the Guard was not a charitable institution, too!”